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t3rezi

KYLO REN CALM YO SHIZ
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I have this friend, he fits every description of Kylo-Ren. Hes a tall ass edgy son of a bitch who constantly sneaks up on me to whisper in my ear. I don't know why but tonight he's decided to climb up to my balcony, in Kylo-Ren cosplay and stare at me untill I saw him. WTF
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Sorry

1 min read
I sincerely apologize for my absence on deviantART. I've been technically banned from the site by my mom which is kind of odd. She find the everything is on this site is inappropriate and I shouldn't be looking at it but don't worry she's basically being a typical mom. Anyway a little run through of what's happened if anybody cares to know I'm. My boyfriend has just moved to Alaska and I'm pretty sad about it mostly because High School is starting and I'm going to be alone in a school of over a thousand kids. I have a huge anxiety of crowds which doesn't make this any better
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        A field of tender golden tawny rods rustled like a soft hiss of a snake, shimmering with the breeze that swept the sweet scent of wheat and honey, tainted with a potent wisp of after-rain trees. The damp bark scent swirled about the warm air. Majestic baby-soft colors painted the sky, allowing some protection from the sun.
         Her face gleamed in the massive blinding light of burning gas called the sun. The sun brought life to all that inhabit the earth in it's beautiful glow, but none could compare to her silky soft cheeks, tinged ever so pale as if made of the most pure white rose petal and stunning lavender sweet eyes. Eyes so full of love and life, glistening with more beauty that could put the ancient Greek goddesses to shame. Her sun kissed dandelion soft hair that framed her pale cheeks so eloquently, so perfectly; cut shortly above her sweet shoulders. The vivid orange that made her my sun...my own sun, only mine. Ornate pearls betwixt her black licorice yet candy-sweet lips.A voice of honey-sweet and refreshing as a glass of milk, gentle tones and inflation's of sound embroidered unto a tapestry in which held the magnificence of her words. Such a harmonic pleasure of a voice is a gift. A gift that could make any god bend on knee to listen to her preach hymns of ink so deliberately crafted by her small hand, pages and pages of literature poured from the depths of her complex mind.
        Covering her gentle body was a form fitting gown of a complementing orange with a shimmering embroidered sun in the middle. A slit on each side, starting halfway down her thigh. A darker orange pair of leggings to suit her thin legs, as well as a hood of the same rich red-orange, bunched at her neck and hanging behind her, coming to a point as if it were an oversized night-cap. vivid blue shoes added the perfect pop of color. She was radiant. She was a rose in the dull garden of life that brought joy to all that saw it. Though unlike most delicate roses, she was made of stone. Strong and smart and still more beautiful than the goddess Athena.
 My rose...

my dotage is forever yours...
        voice once full of honey and flow of a gentle stream... cackle and spit venom of guilt...darkness hath no resort in your light... turmoil, a figment of the past. Only love to fill the future... now cast of clouds and pelt thy skin with frigid rain..lavender soft and wondrous glow...an empty lifeless white, inflicting memories of what is to come...

"sweet rose.."

  
"yes dear"
   
"My...you have a stray hair....allow me to fix this.."
  
"he he, if you so wish dear"
  

"Rose...!!!!"
 
"yes dear.....?"
  
"y..your b..bleeding!!!"
  
"i know dear...."
   
"shall I patch it?!"
  
"what use will that do my dear"
   
"R.."

"what use....will that do Kanaya"

"Rose I"

"hush dear I am to hear nor see any more nonsense..."

"I love you"

"..................dote"


"what?"

"doting is not love my dear"

"But Rose I.."

"YOU....my dear...let..."

"no"

"me"

"NO"

"die"

"NO!!!!!"

        Kanaya awoke in a panic of clamorous screams and a cool sweat beading on her pale grey forehead. A soft green comforter, strewn onto the floor. Sheets, rumpled. Her shoulder length hair immensely disheveled during her slumber. She quickly flung to the empty side of the bed, hoping to wrap her arms around her love.
        She found herself having a tight grip on the pillow that once belonged to her love. Jade tears leaked like a waterfall as screams and sobs escaped her black lips. Visions of her love flashed in her head. Leaping from the bed she wrapped her soft red robe around her bare shoulders, her lime green, silk pajamas wrinkled and clinging to her body in the damp sweat that sat upon her no longer luminescent skin, tears soaking into her cheeks now fell to the hard floor in jade tinted liquid. No longer will she glow for her sun has been solemnly taken. Kanaya stood silent in her sobs; the room was dark, shades drawn shut blocking out any and all light. Clothes scattered across the usually neat room. a queen sized bed stood empty and a mess in the center of the circular room, pressed against a wall with a painting of a rose. A large mirror placed next to the large window, draped in thick black curtains. A dresser decorated with ornate and frilly gold carvings, a desk, bearing an array of scattered items that serve no use top the jade blood. A brush, lipstick, husk-top, sewing machine and some pens and paper. The memory of Rose flickered to life.
    
         A soft hum filling the brilliant room. Golden sun gave way through the large bay window. The sound of faint scratching made it's way into the dancing tones of a song with no words, merely a sweet melody. A black object scrawled in swirls and divots, being lifted and dipped into a small bottle then back to the paper to stain it with writing. Her blonde hair made for a veil as rose crafted another frivolous scripture. A black dress with a pinkish purple sash around her waist called for another disappointed suitor of hers. She was mine and I was hers.

        Though the memory left a warmth to the frigid room it was soon gone. She paced a bit along the cold marble floor sobbing hysterically. She peered at the bit of wrist that snuck out of her robe. She looked at the smooth skin. The next thing she found herself rummaging through a drawer, fingers grasping a small metal object. She held it up to see the non existent glint of the light that was not present. She found a black sharpie and carefully drew a heart.
Black cracked lips, strained into a smile. She held the object in her hand. Discarding the robe to the floor. She stared at herself in the dark, but felt nothing for her un-dead appearance. She paid no mind to it. Instead she stood their, looking at her sickly form. The blade to her wrist.
        Like a violin she struck her wrist in tune to her passed lover's favorite symphony. Jade liquid poured from her wounds. she open her lips to release a vast amount of laughter. Screaming into the void in which her ceiling is made of.
 The glistening jade dripping onto the floor as tears slid down her pale cheeks. Heavy sobs, nearly throwing her off balance. She laughed and sobbed as the blood stained piece of metal fell to the floor along with her frail form, collapsing into a pathetic heap. Her eyes burned and her throat hoarse. tired and weak she fell into a light nap on the floor.

        Nearly five hours later and a few cups of cold tea knocked over and discarded, she found herself slip back into the hysteria, rocking and laughing at herself muttering curses. Picking at the fuzz on the robe the  and gazing at the painting of a rose with a smile placed on her dry lips. She sang softly every delicate word to the song Thousand years. Her faint voice interrupted by sobs and coughs every now and then. She lost herself into a deep trance. Not even noticing the creaking of her door as the softly sniffling figure of Karkat Vantas entered her room. His rust red eyes filled with liquid colored to match his fiery eyes. Small candy corn horns poking from a mess of short black hair which complemented his grey skin and black sweater which bore the cancer symbol. He reached a hand to her shoulder, only grasping a handful of robe. She was nothing but a skeleton at this point. He gasped and whined for her to say some thing, but she paid no mind to him. His whines quickly turned to screams and sobs and pulling of the robe to make her move, which she didn't. He hung on her arm and sobbed for a while before fleeing the room. The young Vantas slammed the door. The vibrations sent the painting off it's hook and onto the floor.
        kanaya stayed seated and silent. The charcoal rings under her cloudy eyes only darkening. Day after day. Night after night. Kanaya would repeat her cycle. Cry, cut, sing, sit, ignore her friends. Ever since Karkat's visit her friends would let themselves in to tend to her. They of course had their break downs, screaming and crying and begging her to get up and eat. Nothing worked. Plates of food and cups of tea were brought in and taken away like clock work. Breakfast was brought by Aradia and tea by Nepeta then Vriska would bring lunch and karkat would bring tea or juice and take the un-touched breakfast. Then Sollux brought dinner and Dave brought drink and took the un-eaten lunch. They continued this pattern until the day when she had enough. She locked her door, keeping everyone out and away from her.

        Eridan Ampora paced around his room, his combat boost thumping across the aged wooden floor. He was deep in though. He and Feferi had been going through a rough patch as moirails and Kanaya was like his "fill-in" moirail; it had been months since he'd herd from her, it was beginning to worry him. He rubbed his templates together until, like a fish on a hook, he was pulled from the ocean of thought in which he swam by the sound of his husk-top. Someone had pesterchumed him. He quickly opened the icon to find that a certain cat troll was messaging him.

             ArsenicCatnip [AC] began pestering CaligulasAquarium [CA]
 
AC: Eridan?
AC:Eridan?
AC:ERIDAN?!
AC: DAMMIT ERIDAN FUCKING ANSWER!!!!!
CA: MY COD WWHAT???????????
AC: you jerk!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
CA: wwhat?!?!
AC: I've been trying to get a hold of you furr a while
AC: It's your turn!
CA: um...?
AC: ARE YOU REALLY THAT DENSE!!!!
CA: calm dowwn Nep
CA: wwhats wwrong??????
AC: wait
AC: you didn't know???????????????????????
CA: KNOWW WWHAT NO ONE TELLS ME ANYFIN
AC: Rose died
CA: wwho?
AC: KANAYA'S MATESPRITE
CA: oh cod...
AC: It's your turn to check in on her
CA: I'll get there immediately

CaligulasAquarium [CA] ceased pestering ArsenicCatnip [AC]


IGNOR THE BELOW PART
OR DONT
I DONT MIND
IT WAS AN ATTEMPT AT AN ENDING
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
ALTERNATE ENDING


She nearly shrieked when the sound of not so delicate knocking came to her door. She strode over and opened the wooden barrier only enough to see who was so idiotic as to disturb her at such in ungodly hour. Slipping the soft robe back on, staining it in her fresh cuts. With a click she unlocked her door. Her prison sell now had a visitor.
She peered out to see the tall figure of Eridan Ampora. Her joyful composure  gone back to a hollow shell. She nearly let out a bark at the sea-dweller. She was furious at his ignorance, his mockery of Rose. His inane behavior when first meeting her. Kanaya began to slam her door, but was caught off guard by a decorated hand shoving the door open, throwing the weekend form of Kanaya Maryim to the ground. A blinding beam of light poured into the room and the only thing to disturb it was the outline of the fish troll. Kanaya cursed at him more than she'd ever let anyone know, unveiling all the pent up vurbal abuse for the sea-dweller in one slurred raging scream.

Eridan's Pov.

I couldn't take it. Kanaya has been shut up in her room for weeks. Not eating, not talking to anyone. For the first time ever, I'm genuinely concerned for her. I stormed up to her room. I knocked on the door....
I could say a million and one things... she looked like a ghost....
She began closing the door
"No"
Pushing the door, expecting a fight, I only found myself pushing on empty space. Looking at the prison she had bound herself too made my heart lurch. I looked down at the venting jade blood. Looking at her skeletal form I noticed the stream of green that leaked from an unknown origin. My sneaking suspicion got the better of me as I made my way to the angry rainbow drinker.

3'd person POV.

He grabbed her wrist brutally. She shrieked in pain as he did so. ruthlessly pulling the sleeve back as she writhed to be free. His grip tightened until she finally gave out. her body basically a limp sobbing puppet. He released his grip having left bruises. He said nothing, turning around and closing the door, then the curtian. Sealing the prison back into darkness. For Kanaya she was her own god in the dark. Hearing his boots on the marble coming toward her. She avoided his strategic hand to lift her, she dodged it. She retreated to her bed to hide.
"kan! wwhat the hell is going on? you'vve been shut up in your room for wweeks..."
"....' she mumbled in a barely audible voice.
"wwhat?"
" I DON'T CARE. I HATE THIS LIFE, THIS GAME, MYSELF. ALL OF IT IS JUST PAIN TOPPED OFF WITH SADNESS DISGUISED AS A HARMLESS PIECE OF CHILD'S PLAY, BUT IT'S NOT HARMLESS. IT'S TAKEN THE ONE I LOVE AND WITHOUT HER I'M WORTHLESS" she shouted between sobs.
He quickly located the weeping troll, engulfing her in a tight hug. To his surprise she did not fight him. Instead her non-rhythmic sobs told hints of a tune. She slowed her breath to hum the symphony she'd previously used while slashing her wrists. she let faint words of a song float into the cold air.
"you would not believe your eyes....
if ten-thousand fireflies
lit up the world as I fell asleep..."
the words flowed softly
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monster

2 min read
Help.
It's addictive.
This mix of fear and joy. Nervous and happy. Terrified and safe.
He makes me feel like his deep seaded rage, his burning black pit of ominuss homicidal thoughs and fears. Blackening by the second; adding more and more bubbleing, boiling pain to the sticky pit of anger. It frightens me too know he has such thoughts and power, but then again I feel safe. I feel like in a time of need I could call out his name and he'd be there. I feel a suffocating battle in him. An imprisoned side he will never let out, but is slowly sratching his walls away, peeking through every now and then.

 I look into his deep dark brown eyes, they dazzle me in a way I cannot explain. They look into me. The scare me. They hide from me. They lie to me. Over and over, they lie "hes okay" they tell me "stop asking pleasw hes fine" they cry "i want to hurt. I am hurt" they whisper in me. Why do they tell me what should remain unherd. 

  His strong build teanses and relaxes. I feel adrenalin course through me as the air thickens to a smoke of murderous intentions. I stay still. I don't know what to do. I am weak compared to someone like him. My nightmares show me his unwanted side...

 I hate the word so I'm gonna use "like".
I like his happy side. I like his protective side. I like is impulsive side. I like his aggressive side. I like his strenght. I like his arau........i really like his dark side....
I'll never tell him this. It's to weird. He strikes me as a one night stand guy. I guess I'm saveing my self a heart break. I hope he never finds this.....

I cant get him out of my head. His lazy smile that says "motherfucker you can't hide shit from me" I melt to it and I think he knows that.


Am I just a child?


Liveing in a fantasy?

For him?



...
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Your name is nepeta leigon, you are skipping happily toward your flush crush's hive. His name is Karkat Vantas, but to you it's Karkitty. You hold the small crab plushie that you so carefully stitched yourself. A light olive blush creep over your face as the though of him lingered.
"oh karkitty I hope you except my felines furr mew" you think while skipping down the sidewalk. Finally you reach his hive. You remember how you even thought up to do this

Flash back_ you were at Dave's hive when he mentioned a special human holiday called Valentine's Day. Thats when you thought up your "purr"fect plan.
En Flashback_

Your hemo pumper beat furiously as you reached a blue gloved hand to knock on the door.

karkats POV_
you had been pondering all day if you could go through with it. You had a plan to go to your flush crush's hive and confess to her. You thought about her more, her bright sparkleing eyes, cute little acent, positive additude, and her blue tail and hat how you longed for a matesprite like her. You picked up the cat plushie you somehow made for her and bolted out your door only to topple over your sweet flush crush.
 "OH FUCK NEPETA IM SORRY I DIDNT SEE YOU THERE" rubbing your head you looked her over. She had on a short black skirt and some green knee highs, a baggy kitten sweater and her blue gloves. A bright red blush could be found on your face. She looked so cute.

Nepeta's POV_
you could feel his stare as you blushed more. Gog you loved him. So withgout thought you kissed him and he kissed back.
 "karkitty would mew be my meowsprite?"
 you felt him kiss you once more and whisper softly "happy valentines day matesprite"
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